A message delivered at West Richmond Friends Meeting for on July 21, 2024
He said to them, “It was because you were so hard-hearted that Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another commits adultery, and he who marries a divorced woman commits adultery.”
Matthew 19:8-12
The disciples said to him, “If such is the case of a man with his wife, it is better not to marry.” But he said to them, “Not everyone can accept this teaching, but only those to whom it is given. For there are eunuchs who have been so from birth, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by others, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Let anyone accept this who can.”
Growing up with parents who divorced when I was very young, the first part of today’s scripture was very familiar to me. In my community, divorce was frowned upon, and this passage was frequently quoted to support that attitude. It felt like there was a perfect mold for life which my family didn’t fit, and we were less worthwhile than others because of it.
But as I examine this passage now, I don’t see a condemnation of families who have experienced divorce. Instead, I see Jesus criticizing the way that marriage and divorce were being wielded in his community to abuse and objectify women in particular. Men at this time had the legal right to divorce a woman, but women had nearly no legal standing to divorce their husbands. Divorced women were often left without property or means to work, and seen as undesirable for future marriages. This meant that men had the power to constrain a woman in a marriage where she was unhappy or mistreated, but on the other hand men could get a divorce and remarry at will, leaving their former wives unable to provide for themselves. As Jesus so often does, he suggests in this passage that those who would follow him should hold themselves to a higher standard that leaves no room to use the laws and social structures to their own advantage over others.
Throughout this entire chapter, in fact, Jesus points out that there is a holiness to those who are outside of or at the lower ends of human social structures and classifications. In the latter part of the passage we read, Jesus holds up eunuchs as an example of a way to escape the abuse of marriage and gender roles. Better to have no standing within the legal systems of marriage and the production of heirs than to risk leveraging your power over another. Next we have the story of children being brought to Jesus, which concludes with him saying that “the Kingdom of Heaven belongs” to ones like these children who would be so quickly dismissed or pushed away. Following that is the rich young man who Jesus instructs to give all he owns to the poor, to escape the trap of hoarding wealth and power. And finally Jesus states that “many who are first will be last, and the last will be first.” In case we missed it the first time, we’re shown again and again that the Kingdom of God is built in large part by stepping outside the hierarchies, binaries, and rankings presented by the world around us.
The holiness and power of existing outside of binaries is borne out in stories about eunuchs throughout the Bible. There are many stories about how those who fall outside the “normal” structure of gender can play a vital role in God’s work. These can be powerful examples of how God’s will is enacted in unexpected ways, often through those who are looked down upon or cast out.
Eunuchs in Ancient Law
Much like trans people today, eunuchs in the ancient world were the subject of significant legal discourse. Deuteronomy 23:1 excludes eunuchs from full participation in temple rituals. But later interpretations, during the Second Temple Period, offered a more nuanced perspective. Rabbis debated categories like “saris adam” (man-made eunuchs) and “saris hamma” (eunuchs of the sun, or those made eunuchs by nature), acknowledging the diversity among eunuchs and allowing for inclusion of some, but not all, eunuchs in temple worship alongside their communities.
God’s Promise Through Isaiah
Even within scripture, there is a move toward inclusion and expansiveness with regard to eunuchs. In Isaiah, the author speaks of God’s blessings, saying:
“Do not let the foreigner joined to the Lord say,
‘The Lord will surely separate me from his people’;
and do not let the eunuch say,
‘I am just a dry tree.’
For thus says the Lord:
To the eunuchs who keep my sabbaths,
who choose the things that please me
and hold fast my covenant,
I will give, in my house and within my walls,
a monument and a name
better than sons and daughters;
I will give them an everlasting name
that shall not be cut off.”
Isaiah 56:3-5
This passage is a powerful expansion of God’s vision for those who were treated as outsiders. It assures us that God’s love extends to everyone, regardless of societal labels or limitations. Our value in God’s eyes is not determined by our gender or ability to procreate. Even those who have been told they can’t contribute to their communities because they are “like a dry tree” are welcome in God’s Kingdom and called to do God’s will.
Eunuchs: Serving God in Unique Ways
Throughout the Bible, we see stories of eunuchs serving God in significant ways. In the story of Esther, two eunuchs helped her to become queen and protect her people. Hegai was in a position of authority over the women of the king’s household and used it to empower Esther, ultimately saving the Jewish people. But Hegai wasn’t the only Eunuch who helped Esther in the story. When she wasn’t able to contact her family directly, Esther asked another eunuch named Hathack to help pass messages. This is how Esther learned of the plot to destroy the Jewish people, and was able to prevent their genocide. In a time and place where women were often ignored or treated as property, these two from their positions outside standard gender roles saw Esther’s potential and helped protect her and her people against violence and oppression.
Similarly, Daniel was brought to Babylon to be trained by the chief eunuch. This chief eunuch allowed exceptions to the rules that were given for exiled boys to allow Daniel to follow Hebrew law and worship God still in that far off place. Some scholars believe Daniel himself may have been made a eunuch. The prophet Isaiah had told King Hezekiah that his descendants would be made eunuchs in Babylon, and Daniel is not reported to have any spouse or children. Whether or not he was made a eunuch, he trained with them and filled similar roles to eunuchs in the king’s court. Despite living in exile from his home and being faced with many challenges, Daniel remained steadfast in his devotion to God. He refused to compromise his beliefs, even when it meant defying cultural norms or risking his position or even his life. His unwavering faith and exceptional wisdom earned him the respect of the Babylonian kings, Nebuchadnezzar and Darius. This position of influence he earned through his faithful outsider’s perspective allowed Daniel to advocate for the people of Israel, protecting them from persecution and even saving them from mass destruction on multiple occasions.
When the prophet Jeremiah was in his old age and had been imprisoned in a cistern by his detractors, it was the eunuch Ebed-Melech who staged a covert but compassionate rescue. In the story, Ebed-Melech doesn’t just bring ropes to help pull Jeremiah out of the pit he’d been trapped in, he also brings soft cloths and instructs the aging prophet to cushion the ropes with cloth to avoid rope burns. His position as a caretaker and servant provided Ebed-Melech with the will to act and the compassion to ensure that Jeremiah was well cared for even in this urgent situation.
In the book of Acts, one of the first non-Jewish Christians we’re told of is the Ethiopian eunuch who Phillip is called to meet on the road by a leading from God. The eunuch is traveling away from Jerusalem, reading from the book of Isaiah. We’re told he came to Jerusalem to worship there, and there is good reason to believe he may have been turned away from the temple that he traveled so far to worship in. I can hear the echo of rejection when he asks Phillip “What is to prevent me from being baptized?” I’ve asked much the same before: What rule will be cited or what part of who I am will be used to keep me from worshiping God with others? But rather than being rejected, he was miraculously sought out by God through Phillip to be a part of the new creation and a follower of Christ.
Let Anyone Accept This Who Can
So, when I feel discouraged or like I don’t belong in Christian spaces, I remember these eunuchs. They defied societal norms just by existing outside the expected boundaries. But even more than that, they served God faithfully. This is a powerful reminder that God has a place and purpose for all of us, in all our unique ways, even when we don’t fit neatly into the roles and labels assigned to us. Just like these eunuchs, we can dedicate ourselves fully to God’s purposes, even if the world struggles to understand how we could possibly fit into God’s plan. In fact, sometimes, it’s by challenging social hierarchies, legalistic restrictions, and perceived binaries that we most effectively contribute to building the Kingdom of God.